It’s the small things

We’ve all heard about not despising small beginnings, but in all honesty, I don’t know of anybody that would choose to start small if they had a choice. Nobody does, yeah we may have to grudgingly accept, that we have to grind out sleepless nights, and embrace the physical, psychological and emotionally self-mutilating things that come with success before we reach our goals, but if there was a way we could outsource the pain and self-sacrifice we would pay thousands. We are a generation of instant gratification, we incessantly record every little accomplishment, we all want to win and win quickly! We want to be the young symbol of success, Forbes 30 under 30, we want to be able to live the quotable boss babe Instagram captions (I’m guilty of this, don’t judge lol).

We want to be the sage and guru on advice from love to career to everything in between, even if we are just pushing 25 and still living with our parents. The human ego is a voracious beast that needs to be stroked and can be really difficult to control in the age of unbridled exhibitionism, it seems like we are no longer content in having or doing the little things, whether they be blessings or instructions from God.

But then we say but God that isn’t much, that isn’t something to celebrate about, that isn’t something to pay attention to and perfect, it’s nothing, it’s just a small thing. Don’t get caught up in the hype Luke 16:10 says ‘’If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.’’

To be faithful means to be steadfast, loyal, constant, faultless, dedicated, and committed. Starting small and allowing yourself to grow steadily, doesn’t mean seeing yourself as someone who doesn’t have ambitions or is blissfully content with mediocrity, it means realizing that with big blessings and great open doors sometimes comes tremendous and overwhelming responsibilities, it may require you to develop and discard some character traits, it is better for you to make a fool of yourself as a leader of a small team of just 5 people, than as a CEO of a company with over 10,000+ staff.

A lot of us may be extremely intelligent, creative and talented but have poor social skills, we may rob people off the wrong way and actually be unlikable, we may even be too arrogant for our own good, never willing to buckle down and actually listen to constructive criticism, it is better for the Lord to use that small platform to train, refine and humble us as individuals so that when we actually go out on the big stage we are worthy representatives who bring glory to his name.

Whatever we do, no matter how small or insignificant we might feel it is, sometimes we need to get out of our head, our feelings and our constant need to compare the metaphorical size of our backyard to others and see it as an opportunity to bring Glory to God.

Give that small business or idea to God be faithful, work hard and be diligent and see what God will use it to do.

A lot of us get caught up in the size, if you are a social media creative or influencer, you may get caught up in the numbers, the likes and the comments. If you are a business owner you may get caught up in the growth and the bottom line, if you are starting a ministry you may get caught up in how much of an audience you draw in, stop chasing numbers! Chase consistency and being faithful, relax and let God do the rest, one of the most important things, is to ensure that you are developing the character skills that you will need to have when you actually get the big things you desire.

Stop being petty and spiteful, curb the gossiping, take control of your tendency to dip into the pockets of the business for personal expenses (Yes I said it lol), work on your emotional intelligence, develop a heart of service, sharpen your skills, improve your networking and communication skills, take care of the little foxes in your life that have the potential of ruining all what you have worked for, when you finally become a success (Solomon 2:15).

God is a perfectionist, he doesn’t do things in half measures, he wants us to be perfect representations of him here on earth, now those are pretty big shoes to fill and very high standards, he will never withhold any good or wholesome thing from you, however he will delay it while perfecting you if he knows you are not ready for it (even if you think you are!).

So whatever he has laid on your heart to do, whatever you find yourself doing in every sphere of life, even if you are disappointed in yourself, and you feel that after putting in so many years, you should have a bigger platform or be in a better place in life, remember that if you put your trust in God and do the necessary work you will most certainly reach your goal. Don’t look down on yourself because you started small, rather see it as a learning curve, a period of grace if you will, to perfect all that concerns you, remember the Holy Spirit is always available to lead and guide.

“Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient spirit is better than a proud one’’. Ecclesiastes 7:8

Hiatus

I have been putting off blogging for so long,I have sat down,organized,marked down in my calendar,written so many blog posts in my head for weeks,until finally today at 5.18 am in the morning in my typical fashion,I just sat down and decided to write.

I’m not a planner,I don’t do well with organizing and plotting charts of how i am going to get things done. I’m very organic about everything I do,I’m the kind of person that will just get up one morning and do what I want to do when the light bulb gets turned on.

What I decided to do with this blog was to plan and organize, and I failed miserably because it’s really just out of character for me this is how God made me I have to work with it,I’ve fought it I won’t lie,I’ve really tried to be that person but I’m not,I’m not a planner I’m a doer,I literally just get a light bulb switch and do.

Anyway I digress,the gist is,I took an unplanned hiatus,after writing three posts,partly because I’m still trying to figure out what I want to achieve with my writing. I believe everything in life should have purpose and meaning.

What do I really want to say,firstly I really want to talk about God. I do. I want to talk about my faith,I want to talk about existential questions,I want to talk about life,I want to talk about deep stuff.

The question is how,I want to maintain a balance and if I do talk  about God I do need to be inspired by the Holy Spirit, but even with that I do fear,will my words contradict my actions,I’m too real of a person,I can’t do the whole motivational christian thing I’m sorry,I’m not the girl who is going to tell you what to do or how to live your life,but I do want to share stories,I just want you to stop and think sometimes,I want to express conversation that is deeply introspective and observational,I get overwhelmed sometimes,when I think about what I want to do.

So,I’ve decided to do what I do best,just write stuff that’s in my head when the light bulb comes on,if you know me personally and you end up reading this blog,please read objectively don’t try to reconcile the girl you know,  with the person who writes this blog,they are sometimes two very different people. I really don’t like being deep in my day to day life I’m sorry haha ,it’s exhausting,I just want to do my workouts,eat my salad and watch my YouTube videos, here is where I’d like to get more intellectual I suppose.

So i’m back to writing,i think i will do about two posts a month and work my way up,mainly because i want it to be as authentic as possible. I am an extremely principled person I try to always be honest and forth right in everything including my writing,so I’d rather give you less and be honest,than give you more and not really mean what I say.

Always feel free to comment,I’m open to conversation. I hope you enjoy my upcoming content.

 

Light & Life

Light & Life

What is light,light brings illumination.
What does it mean to be illuminated, to have knowledge,to have understanding and a clear view.
Why do we need light,because without it we will stumble in the dark,we would be lost,darkness breeds fear,confusion and panic.
Who or What is the true source of light,the same who is the true source of life.
He is known as the word,the bread of life,the resurrection and the life,the true vine,the source by which all things exist and consist.
For without him nothing can exist or be created,he is the one who lighted the path of men and brought the gift of his essence eternal life to be made available to all men.
He is the way,the truth and the life,there is no other path that guarantees the hope of eternal life asides him.
There is no ambiguity,he has made it clear if you seek for things beyond the material things of this world all you have to do is look to him.

My Special Friend

Sometimes I sit and stare for hours
They say his presence is here but I feel nothing.
Week after week Sunday after Sunday
The words are spoken and heard but hardly ever felt.
I clap, I shout, I know the words by heart but sometimes it’s all a farce.
Sometimes I think he’s probably made up by fools who know no better
Who make up rules and form tales of wistful hereafters.
Sometimes I just want to do my own thing.
Meet the man of my dreams, have a couple of kids and travel by boat to Timbuktu.
And when I’ve finally convinced myself that perhaps he cannot be real, found or known
Alas, there he is knocking at the door of my heart
He’s patient, he’s kind, he’s always a gentleman, never rude, never hasty
Always willing to take his time, but persistent.
I ignore him sometimes, he annoys me sometimes but I find it hard to resist.
He asks me to sup with him, to dine with him, to sit at his feet, he asks for a lot and I’m afraid to give
He knows I will struggle, I like to be in control I do not know him, I cannot trust the unknown.
But I have to admit that when I’m alone I often think about the hole in my heart that only he can fill.
For he sticks closer than a brother and loves harder than a mother.
He knows my fears, he sees my secret tears, he understands my pain and looks beyond my flaws.
I will probably never be quite good enough,he knows, I may never respond to him the way he wants me to, I may even out rightly reject him and be downright rude.
But he’s always there knocking, seeking and asking to be my friend.

Beginnings

Welcome to my blog!

As far as I can remember I’ve always wanted to write. As a child I wrote poetry and short stories,I had imaginary friends,I would completely get lost in my own head and create story lines and plots .

But somewhere along the line,I grew up and traded passion for practicality. First of all, i tend to be highly self critical, i didn’t think my work would ever be good enough to even get published, so i didn’t really want to try because of fear of failure.

Secondly,I thought what if I get bored or tired and have nothing to say,or what if what I say doesn’t make any sense. I thought about all those things.

Now a couple of years later,I’ve decided to start writing again,mainly because I always have ideas, thoughts and conversations and I have no real outlet for them,and because self expression and the ability to convey thoughts and ideas into written form is a gift that has been given to me by my creator that I should express.

My subject matter is broad and diverse, i talk about my take on faith,love,friendships and all other things we millennials love, but most importantly i like to be honest and sometimes personal in my writing, i want to connect with my reader, i want them to see a little bit of themselves in me, as if my words are a personal diary.

Do enjoy.

With Love Ndidi